One of the hardest things I am processing through while being in the Dominican Republic is my plan for what I want to do after graduating next May. This decision has been heavy on my heart for a long time, but it became even more real when I got here and had to answer the question of, “Oh, you’re a senior… what are you doing after you graduate?” with, “I’m not sure yet” about a million times. Not being able to answer this question has hit me with the harsh reality that I don’t have a plan for my life at this moment. At first this concerned me and made me feel like I was on a path to nowhere. But that is the complete opposite feeling from what I am supposed to be experiencing at this point in my life! I can find rest and comfort in knowing that I don’t always have to control my life. The Lord knows where I am going to be post-graduation, and that place is going to be significantly better than anything I can ever dream of.
I just finished reading I Don’t Wait Anymore by Grace Thornton and was super encouraged by her experiences. Grace talks a lot about coping with the unexpected and what it looks like to be single in a time of life where it seems like everyone around you has a significant other. Scripture flows through Grace’s words and she speaks truth over her readers as she encourages them to be steadfast in their faithfulness to God’s plan for their life.
“From up here on the mountain above all the small stuff, it’s clear. We can see it. We can see God for who He is. A treasure worth everything. We see that the story that gets us to Him is so much greater than the dreams we had for ourselves that didn’t work out.”
“I was reminded this morning that it’s going to be okay …That God has this story written already. That it may be hard, but it ends really, really well. And that I feel most like myself, most alive, when the joy of what’s still to come in Christ fills me up, when I’m overflowing with it. I feel most life myself, most alive, because of Christ. Because of the life yet to come in Him.”
“He began to spin a story greater than anything I had ever seen, more meaningful than anything I could’ve dreamed, with threads woven into them that the greatest storyteller on earth could never come up with in a million years.”
Reading Grace’s words has given me a fresh perspective on my life. I Don’t Wait Anymore has made me see that I don’t have to have my life figured out because God knows where I am going to end up. It may not be where I thought I would be, but it is going to be where He made me to be. I want to take life one day at a time, and right now that is going to look like me focusing on loving the kids, staff, and my fellow interns here. I have 5 weeks left, and I am going to use those weeks as intentionally as I can.